Sidestep

The day swallowed; in 
the sun too long,

burning, I would run,
always behind a
shadow, a butterfly
I think, following

one created small, too –
carried with the wind
when it gusts, wings

assumed by outline
of one who flies.

Either way, the reminder of
fragility, to be made barely,

front a too bright light, colorless
and I know looking back pointless;

she follows whether I look or
do not see, so I found
a place with the trees
once  –  how I felt held

light as a paper; they reminded
of my father, catching
where made empty by an arm
with too needy of so much

and I un-did a bit,
unfolded at the feet
of every giant – a
once girl, become
heavy with rain

marking outline of roots
upon a blank page kept
in the back pocket,

to be impressed upon
like a map presses,
a way to the third self,
as infinite as the tree
I chose as mother, who
is here always by choice,
my own at least – without

taking of it, only the way
I feel be-side, leaning
upon, just a bit

into a way that would
choose life despite,
feeling like work
has been done/

I can fold along old creases
I felt once my weakness
as if how we begin is
the cause of pain,

and twice a child,
once pressed quiet as
a blanket ironed flat
is made agreeable,

draped upon, to fill gaps
and shaded places
of the one who
made her –

the first rendering,
draping upon every
coldness in the self

like a tree feasts on the
own, fallen leaves.